The Cutprice Guignol

The Sixth Year: American Sigh Story

Category: random dickery

On Oversharing

Hey, I’m Lou! Would you like to hear about my vagina? Or my self-harm? Or my sexuality? Or my anxiety disorder? Or depression? How about my vagina again? I’ve written about it all, in great detail, right here, for your browsing pleasure.

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A Beginner’s Guide to Self-Harm

Well, I got you there with that clickbait title, didn’t I? This isn’t actually going to be a guide on how to self-harm, because I feel like my desperation for views hasn’t quite dipped that far yet. But I do want to talk about the stuff you may not know about self-harm, and why it doesn’t necessarily work the way you might think it does. Trigger warning for discussion of self-harm and suicide.

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The Scariest TV Scenes in History

So, a couple of weeks ago, my writing partner and I wrote an article over on our film blog, No But Listen, about the scariest scenes in movie history, and that got me to a-thinking. I love all things horror, and it seemed a shame to stop there when there’s so much freaky shit on TV to delve right on into. So while these may not be the scariest scenes in TV history, they’re certainly the ones that kicked the emotional crap out of me when I first saw them and the ones I most often bring up in therapy sessions. Time to rake over some traumatic childhood (and miscellaneous) memories!

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Ruthless Release Announcement!

Yay! It’s Monday, and I have a new release to share with you all! Without further ado, let me introduce you to Ruthless.

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The Thing

For as long as I can remember, I have used things to keep me safe from the way I feel.

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NaNoWriMo: A Survival Guide

Well, here we are again: at the end of October, just about to tip over from “spooky season” into “really fucking terrifying season”, thanks to the fact that many of us will be taking up the hallowed mantel of National Novel Writing Month and putting our stories to the page over the course of November.

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ALPHA FEMALE Release Announcement!

We’ve all been there: it’s Monday, you’re staring down the week ahead with dread in your heart, you just wish something would come along to stretch that weekend out a little longer. Well, I’ve got you covered, bitch!

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Does This Need Tits?: A Beginner’s Guide

We’ve all been there. You’re a TV writer/director and you need to turn in a script, but there’s a little something missing. Action? No, you’ve got that. Drama? That’s ticked off too. Dragons? I mean, yeah, probably that as well. Aha! You’ve got it. This is a TV show with women in it, and that means you need to cram in some topless scenes and jiggle some titties in the face of your audience.

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Zoo is the Only Thing Holding my Life Together

“Wait, there’s a serial killer in Zoo?” My significant other, raising his hand to stop me mid-flow as I talked about the show I’m working my way through at the moment, furrowed his brow. “I thought it was about animals.”

“Well, it is,” I rolled my eyes impatiently. “But the serial killer was the reason the wolves burned down that prison-“

And that’s when I realized I had a problem.

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The Stages of the England Fan

Well, it’s the World Cup – and I know many of you are probably seething with infuriation at having to even think about it for a split second, but I love football and I love the World Cup. What I don’t love about the World Cup? The fucking England squad.

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