Fifty Shades Freed: Chapter One

Happy Saturday! As the world rumbles towards an apparently inevitable doom, it seemed about time that I return to my pit of despair, my white whale- yes, that’s right, it’s finally time to take on the final part of the Fifty Shades Trilogy. With the next movie only a few weeks away, it’s prime time to throw myself at the mercy of the world’s sexiest writer once more. And hope this time she doesn’t force me to read about getting hit on the clitoris with a horsewhip. If you’re new to the blog, catch up on my recaps here; if not, once more into the breach, dear friends- or, indeed, into the bleach, which I imagine I’ll want to chug a litre of by the time this is done. To the first chapter!

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Do you get it? Because she’s called Louise and so am…forget it, I’m wasted on this blog.

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